Resimay (Resume)
RESIMAY
To hoom it mae cunsern
I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.
I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..
I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a
pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond
to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.
I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.
My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,
I can start emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.
hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.
Sinseerly,
Brett
PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a pickture of me.
Employer's response: Dear Brett
It's OK honey, we've got spell check.
See you Monday
Funny Pickup Lines Part 1
The word of the day is "legs." Let's go back to my place and spread the word.
I'm not Fred Flintstone, but I can make your bedrock!
I don't know much about pies but DAMN you make my banana cream.
A cat falls into the water & the rooster laughs. What's the moral of the story??? A wet pu**y alway's makes a happy c*ck.
What has 148 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My Zipper!
My magic watch says that you don't have any underwear on. (She says yes I do) Damn! it must be 15 minutes fast
Crap. Something is wrong with my cell phone. {Oh Really. What is that?} Its just that...your numbers not in it.
I lost my teddy bear, will you sleep with me?
If I received a nickel for everytime I saw someone as beautiful as you, I'd have five cents.
You may fall from the sky, you may fall from a tree, but the best way to fall... is in love with me.
There are 206 bones in the human body... do you want another one?
You know what would look good on you? Me!
Screw me if I am wrong, but haven't we met before?
A boy gives a girl 12 roses. 11 fake, 1 real and he says to her " I will stop loving you when all the roses die"
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
Robert Muraine In Ikea Commercial
America's #1 Popper, Robert Muraine locks and pops in an Ikea commercial featuring another lady popper. They look like the perfect popping couple!
